I've learned from that short little trip that I am a very sensitive person, exceptionally sensitive if it is someone whom I care for dearly. I still have a lot to learn on my behalf to be a better person who I am at present. To love myself more and not just to give entirely in for someone else while I neglect to love myself in the process. I guess I realize that when a big problem arises between someone important to me, if that something never gets solved at that moment, it will haunt me throughout the entire day and even causing me to be unable to sleep. I guess I have to accept the truth that, I do not know how to handle things in a mature manner and my way of thinking has yet to be developed to a stable state to who I am today.
On the other hand, because of such dismal state that I was in. I discovered that I am gifted in a sense that I have many friends around me who cares for me. Friends who I believe are of the ones who will stay in my life for a very long time. During my first year in college, I did not really have any close friends at all. But on the second year of college, that changed and I have found two close friends because we would go take an extra mile to the end of the city, enduring traffic jams JUST to have a bite on delicious food! That statement of close friends isn't sufficient anymore at the current moment, they are more of brothers to me right now. I was touched, very touched when I told one of them what I was facing in that evening as we were walking back home after class ended. That night as I thought the night would just pass by as how it normally would, then my bro messaged me if i needed to go out so that I could get my mind off things, I said its alright and he replied me immediately, "Just say yes if you need it. I know how you feel because I have been there". My eyes began to water immediately after reading that, even typing it out right now just makes my vision slightly blurry. Thank you my friends.
Actually I realize that I have been living with me,myself and I for over 21 years already. I don't see why I should be disheartened because of this, It have always been like this. Chins up, chests outwards Johnny! You can do this! Its not your first time falling and not your first time walking through the ups and downs in what LIFE has to offer! Believe in yourself, and believe in a better tomorrow John!
